Resume the broken relationship after a break

Not all relationships are the same and neither are their breaks. There are for all tastes: scandalous, silent, quiet, publicized, ... But above all there is something that defines them: if they are a final point or are a point and a part and there may be more relationship from that moment. There are times when it is possible that after a courtship comes a friendship or that the break is only a crisis and at the same time there is a reconciliation.

A break does not have to mean that the relationship has ended and that all the possibilities of romance have been exhausted. It may be the case that there are more and more reasons to be together again than to have broken. Is it possible to resume a relationship after a break?

The answer is clear: yes, but. When a relationship is broken it is because there is something that does not work. If the circumstances remain the same when the romance is to be retaken, there must be a change. Otherwise, the result will be the same: a new rupture that will have greater consequences. If breaking a relationship can be hard for the parties when it happens a second time it is even worse.

About the broken relationship:

“You find out what you are made of when you have a broken heart. If it happens early and often, all the better.” – Isabel Gillies"

DOES IT WANT TO RECOVER THE RELATIONSHIP?

Is it worth recovering the relationship? It is the first thing we have to ask ourselves when we consider giving a second chance to a romance. In a scale -which can be represented graphically in a list of pros and cons- analyze if there are more positive things in the relationship than negative ones. If so, go ahead.

But at the time of making this assessment of the courtship, be honest with yourself. This is a matter of two, probably the crisis that led you to break was not the fault of just one of the people involved. The two parties should consider doing different things. If there is no commitment because it is so for one of the two, the reconciliation may not last long or the other person may be dissatisfied.

Understanding and empathy helps to feel interest again

When you start a relationship a second time there are different circumstances when you started. So to speak you are not new, but with a baggage, with a backpack, which carries what caused the crisis. It is difficult, but it is best to do a clean slate and try to start from scratch.

If an adultery, to give an example, made the relationship end you can not be thinking about it continuously or, when an argument occurs be the first weapon used. In case of not being able to overcome the circumstances that led to the initial break, the reconciliation may not work and end up being very harmful to the couple.

About the broken relationship:

“I’d rather have a broken arm than a broken heart.” – Christie Brinkley

TIME HEALS MANY THINGS, BUT NOT EVERYTHING

A separate time can be a good thing in a romance, it can mean that each one meets the other and changes things that lead to the relationship recovering from a crisis. True, but not being separated will solve the problems that were before. You have to find a solution for them.

In addition, the separated time can serve so that one of the parties of the couple realizes that it is better to have broken. Taking time is a double-edged sword when it comes to facing the crisis in a courtship. If you raise it in a relationship, keep in mind that it is not a synonym for reconciliation.

Dialogue is one of the fundamental bases of any relationship. On numerous occasions a crisis has come about because of not talking enough. Do not make that mistake if you are going to give a second chance. Before doing so, sit down and expose your thoughts and feelings, something that you should think about beforehand so that the talk is not influenced by what the other is going to say.

By giving the relationship a second chance, you are already clear about what did not work and what you are not willing to give up. Expose it to your partner and try to find a consensus. If you reach it, you will have overcome the crisis and you can have a most satisfactory relationship. Otherwise, it is not even worth trying.

If during the time you were separated one of the two, or even the two, had other relationships expose it. Even if they were occasional or there is no possibility of repeating them, it is better to know them than to discover them one day by surprise.

Honesty and starting from scratch helps a new beginning

About the broken relationship:

“It’s hard asking someone with a broken heart to fall in love again.” – Eric Kripke

DO NOT RETURN TO THE TIME IT WAS LEFT

Once it has been decided to bet on reconciliation, it must be clear that it can not be done at the same moment it was left. It is much preferable to return progressively. It is not about starting a new relationship, but to go little by little.

To have appointments again, to go to special places, to recover the flame that could have been lost, to fall asleep talking on the phone, ... Retrieve all those little details that make the beginning of relationships so special and that over time They are losing. It's about reconquering each other and this time it will be much easier because you already love each other beforehand.

About the broken relationship:

“I don’t want to break someone’s heart, but you can’t control that. A broken heart happens; that’s inevitable.” – Lykke Li

OTHERS

When considering a reconciliation, we must take into account that other people, apart from the couple, can imply. In that sense, children, if any, are fundamental. In this case it is even more important to recover the relationship little by little, to see if there are possibilities and to avoid letting the children through a new break. The moment you decide that the relationship recovers you have to tell them, but you should not give them false hope otherwise, because they may suffer with this situation of instability more than the couple themselves.

Sometimes it is good to involve friends in this reconciliation. Stay in a group or arrange double appointments. This will break the tension that could be at first. The return to the relationship will be noticed as more natural. Also, in case you feel uncomfortable you will have other friends to turn to.

Friends or family are supportive in these cases, but sometimes it is not enough. There are relationships that drag more problems than others or that have circumstances that make them especially hard. The professionals can help in these cases. A couple therapy, or individual sessions, can help you determine if it is preferable to leave things as they are or recover the relationship. They can also accompany you by guiding you during the reconciliation.

Resume the broken relationship after a break